Family & Divorce Mediation Articles
Success Leaves Clues: A Profile Of Elder Decisions (6/22/09)
Tammy Lenski “There is a great deal of opportunity to create a niche in your community once you have the training and if you are willing to put in the time to market your practice and develop the network of referrals you will need in order to grow,” say Arline Kardasis and Rikk Larsen of Elder Decisions, which scored a major marketing success with National Public Radio in April.
How To Resolve Parenting Disputes (6/22/09)
Arnold W. Zeman We recently featured a video clip of an interview with Justice Harvey Brownstone of the North Toronto Family Court in which he brought to life the principle of acting in the best interests of the child. Here now are his 10 tips for success in resolving parenting disputes from his book, Tug of War: A Judge’s Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles and the Bitter Realities of Family Court:
The Best Interests Of The Child — Peace More Important Than Being Right (6/15/09)
Arnold W. Zeman Justice Harvey Brownstone serves on the North Toronto Family Court and is the author of Tug of War: A Judge’s Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles and the Bitter Realities of Family Court. Below is a 16 minute video clip of an interview of him on TV Ontario’s The Agenda – With Steve Paikin.
When Divorce Means Re-Entering The Job Market (6/01/09)
Laurie Israel In working with divorcing couples, reemployment of an “at-home” spouse is a recurring theme. This is usually (but not always) the wife, who needs to enter the job market after the divorce. An analysis of the finances of a divorce case generally leads to the stark truth that the family unit (now divided into two households) cannot live on the earned income that was being brought into the household prior to the divorce.
The 140-Page Majority Prop 8 Opinion In A Single Paragraph (6/01/09)
Victoria Pynchon Best summary of the 140 page majority opinion (.pdf of opinion here) in Reading the Decision at the Daily Dish by Andrew Sullivan. This opinion eviscerates and then upholds Proposition 8 as constitutionally inoffensive.
Asking The Questions (5/25/09)
Debra Synovec Choosing your divorce mediator is personal. Think about it. You’ll be discussing and making decisions about the things you care about most…..your children, your home, your money, your future, your security, your life. Interview the mediator, ask questions, and make sure they are knowledgeable, dedicated and compassionate. If they will not talk with you before you start, don’t hire them. I have never met a dedicated, compassionate, knowledgeable mediator that is unwilling to talk with a potential client.
Marital Mediation: An Emerging Area Of Practice (5/18/09)
Susan K. Boardman, John Fiske, Laurie Israel, Ken Neumann This article describes the process of “Marital Mediation” as a relatively new field of family mediation, designed to keep couples together using established family mediation techniques. Previously many of these techniques were used solely in divorce mediation. We begin by describing what the process involves, how it differs from both couples counseling and divorce mediation, and why we believe it often works for couples when counseling has not. We also discuss suggestions for promoting the development of Marital Mediation using both research and marketing techniques.
Care-Full Conversations: Elder Mediation And Family Decision-Making (5/18/09)
Susan Curcio M.A. Elder Mediation is a tool that can be used to facilitate difficult decisions for aging adults and their families. Issues regarding the health and safety of a loved one may involve legal and financial considerations which can cause family tensions. The role of the mediator is to assist families in arriving at their own solutions while preserving or improving relationships among the members. Opening the channels of communication may make the job of an attorney or financial adviser easier and more cost-effective.
Mediation As Sales And Niche Mediation Practice With Jim Melamed Of Mediate.Com (4/27/09)
Victoria Pynchon I traveled to the ABA DRS conference in New York City last week with my new video camera. I apologize for my lack of skill with it and with Mac's iMovie. Below, Jim talks about mediate.com's services; its commitment to the further development of the profession; and, mediate.com's commitment to negotiated resolutions in the political sphere.
Book Review: The Healthy Divorce: Keys to Ending Your Marriage While Preserving your Emotional Well-Being (4/10/09)
Joan B. Kelly This book is an updated version of
Between Love and Hate: A Guide to Civilized Divorce, originally published in 1992. At that time, I was troubled by the continuing portrayal by the American media and movies of American divorces as destructive, poisonous, hateful processes and behaviors reminiscent of
War of the Rose, and widely recommended Lois Gold’s book to mental health and legal professionals and separating partners and spouses to educate them about a better way to separate and divorce.
Marital Mediation For Family Mediators (4/07/09)
John Fiske If you are a family mediator, you might expand your practice to offer mediation to help couples stay married. The process, called “marital mediation,” uses the specific settlement focus of mediation to preserve a marriage in ways not attempted by family therapy. The process uses your family mediation skills to help couples negotiate new terms for their marriage. Couples may use mediation to enter into a written post-marital contract defining their own solutions.
Concurrent Mediation Of Parental Disputes And Of Parent-Teen Conflicts (3/30/09)
Cory Mathews The article examines the dilemma for parents facing disputes over parenting arrangements for teenagers. It describes the complex intersection of teen development and parental decision-making. It can be particularly difficult for parents to resolve the disputes between themselves while teens are asserting their own independence. Parents may be faced with increasing conflicts with their ex-partner and with their teen at the same time. The article suggests that mediators explore the opportunity for concurrent mediation, in which parent-teen mediation is offered at the same time as domestic relations mediation between parents. The article suggests that the combination may yield positive results on both conflict-laden fronts.
Top Ten Ways To Protect Your Kids From The Fallout Of A High Conflict Break-Up (3/23/09)
Joan B. Kelly Joan B. Kelly, Ph.D. is a groundbreaking clinical psychologist and researcher who began studying the
impact of divorce on children in 1968. Joan is an author, therapist, mediator, and parenting coordinator
with four decades of experience working with high conflict parents who are separating.
Everything is Negotiable (3/23/09)
Nancy Hudgins, Debra Synovec We Americans generally accept the stated price of goods and services as non-negotiable. I found this assumption to be inaccurate before the financial downturn. It is even more inaccurate now.
Choose Facilitation! (3/16/09)
Nancy Hudgins, Debra Synovec So the first thing to ask a mediator is: Do you use a facilitave style or an evaluative or directive style?
A Glimmer of Light: Divorce & Breakups May Not Feel As Bad As You Think (3/16/09)
Rina Goodman In the beginning, there is disbelief and fear. Questions such as, "What am I going to do?"; "How will I live on my own?"; and "How can I sleep without holding someone?" come spilling forth. The caller continues to speak, but I am not expected to answer. So I listen.
Don't Use "Force" (3/09/09)
Bill Eddy “I won’t force the children to go with the other parent,” is one of the statements I hear sometimes from parents going through a separation or divorce. This statement has become so common (three times in one day recently), that a short article on this subject may be helpful.
Finding Your Divorce Mediator! (3/03/09)
Nancy Hudgins, Debra Synovec Locating a qualified divorce mediator is essential and significant to the process. The mediator is your guide throughout the divorce mediation process. At first locating a mediator may seem like looking for a needle in a haystack because divorce mediators have all sorts of backgrounds and abilities, from lawyers to therapists to financial professionals and many in between. One difficulty is that in most states anyone can hang their shingle and mediate.
So how do you distinguish a really good mediator from a so-so mediator?
Relationships Matter (2/16/09)
Phyllis Pollack Every mediator can tell the tale in which the parties are discussing possible mediators for a mediation and because one party has used a particular mediator before, the other party refuses to agree to use that mediator.
A Question Of Ethics (2/09/09)
Darrell Puls More and more frequently I hear complaints about mediators who tell their clients what is or is not acceptable, particularly for settlements in divorce cases. So much for self-determination and impartiality!
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